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Wednesday, 20 February 2013

I doubt many of you remember Brother to Brother's "I'm Gonna Take Your Love" - it was a pretty damn good bit of funky disco back in '77.  But that doesn't excuse them from this atrocious cover.

I get it.  We're all brothers in creation, black and white.  Ebony and ivory, living together in perfect harmony. Well, the road to crap album covers is paved with good intentions.

He reminds me of John Heder and she..... well, she's about as Cheyenne as Agnetha Fältskog.  Nice hippy name though, I'm diggin' it.  Other group names in a similar vein: Teton & Chip O. Waugh or Smokey & Cher O'Kee

A bit of advice - you can take it or leave it.  If you ever roll up the blinds and this face is staring back at you, call 911 and bolt the doors.  This man is obviously on bath salts.  Do not, under any circumstances, attend his "Carty Party". Bad things go down at the Carty Party.

What are we to make of this? This young filly tickles George while his hand dives into his pocket.  My mind wouldn't jump to the gutter so readily if it weren't for his sly expression.

Left: Hair blown and feathered to perfection. Resting on his upper lip - a source of righteous power and lodestar to all men.  Without his mighty hair, he looks a lot like Timothy Daly. With it, and he is God's gift to womankind.
Center: Disco Juan Epstein is having difficulty staying still for the photo shoot while hopped up on cocaine. And there was simply no way that man pelt was not going on this cover, front and center.
Right: Creepy silent type.  Future sexual offender.  With the benefit of hindsight, Twiggy's beret was probably a bad fashion choice.

"Driver's Seat" (1978) is one of the best songs to come out of the late seventies. This song brings a motherload of memories and just overall kicks me in the ass.  I think it was used in both Boogie Nights and The Walking Dead.

That being said, a man sniffing a woman's tears does not a good album cover make.  In fact, it may be a little on the disturbing side.

Don't bother looking for Paul McCartney.  He isn't here.  However, Paul Simon's younger brother is. No really.

If you grew up in a Christian home in the seventies, chances are you remember Evie.  Truth be told, she has a pretty nice voice, and her songs were often painfully catchy. 

Listen at your own risk.  Evie's voice will haunt you for a minimum of thirty-six years, guaranteed.

Vous avez une éruption terrible sur votre front.

Is the singularly out-of-place Little Dixie Boy one these lads' mother.... or perhaps their Yoko? So help me God, she better not break up the band!

I considered naming this post "More Bad Album Covers" until I came to this one.  This is extreme perfection bordering on divinity.  This album is 'bad', if by bad you mean badass motherf***er.

From the Liner Notes: 

Win with Pride and Glory, Lose with Style
and Grace and remember no matter how
good you are you can always be replaced.



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