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Wednesday, 16 November 2011


Okay, I know - the last thing you want to read right now is another dude's opinions on why weed should be legalized.  However, my retro-infused perspective may offer a few arguments that you might not have thought of before.  Give it a read, and if by Reason #6 you still are nonplussed, move on to one of my comic book or miniskirt posts and forget you ever saw this.  So, here goes...

1) We live in a world that's falling apart at the seams - the amount of rapes, murders, and home invasions in this country is mind boggling..... yet, we spend a huge percentage of our law enforcement budget tracking down potheads and throwing them in jail.  I hope you are never the victim of violent crime, but just know that a lot of money was diverted away from a law enforcement presence in your neighborhoods  toward arresting dope smokers.




2) There is no dissenting opinion on whether cigarettes are addictive; they simply are.  However, there is very little consensus in scientific literature on whether marijuana is addictive.  More than likely, any addictive properties lie in its positive stimuli rather than its chemistry.  In other words, it's soothing and relaxing, and therefore something you apt to sorely miss if you stopped smoking it, in much the same way that Starbucks coffee can be addictive due to the positive mental and physiological state it brings. The chemical properties are non-addictive, but its positive results are likely to illicit a Pavlovian desire for more.

3) It certainly wouldn't solve our economic crisis, but there can be no doubt the government would benefit from the taxation of marijuana.

They kicked the habit. Now they can take baths again.
4) We would save billions by no longer having to prosecute pot smokers and dealers, plus we could get to the cases that actually do need to be tried ASAP. What a travesty that our district attorneys are tied up with pointless drug cases, while rapes and other violent crimes have to wait in line.  Our circuit judges shouldn't have to divide their time between ridiculous criminal possession charges and violent crime.  What a sinful flagrant waste of our court system.

All dope smokers look like this.
5) A metric fuck-ton of the money funneled into the anti-marijuana lobby actually comes from the alcohol and tobacco industry. Now, why would they do that?   Those of you that buy the anti-marijuana message are largely victims of corporate tobacco and alcohol sponsored propaganda.

Marijuana turns prom queens into hippies
6) There is zero scientific evidence that marijuana is a gateway drug.  It's the least hard-core of all the illegal substances out there, so it's a natural and logical starting point on the path to destructive drug usage; however, it is a logical fallacy to assume it is the cause of the escalation.  Often, a person begins with cigarettes, then marijuana, then harder drugs.... why don't we call cigarettes a "gateway drug"?

Close the fuckin' door, pot!
7) No doubt, the tobacco and alcohol lobby against legalization is a big factor; however, many believe the suppression of marijuana legalization stems from a grander conspiracy. The dumb stoner (a la Tommy Chong) is a groundless stereotype.  Marijuana actually enhances mental acuity and accelerates thinking "outside the box". In other words, you are much less likely to waste your evenings glued to Nancy Grace when you're smoking marijuana, and much more likely to start thinking creatively and questioning things... a definite no-no to a government who wants to keep its ignorant masses content.

Don't bogart that joint.
8) Crimes associated with marijuana are directly associated with it being criminalized; legalization would immediately reduce drug related criminal activity.... unlike alcohol, a legal drug which causes tens of thousands of deaths per year via drunk driving, domestic violence, and alcohol poisoning.

Pot will turn you into a tea drinking lesbian.
9) Just because alcohol and tobacco are legal, doesn't mean marijuana should be legal as well. It's the old "two wrongs don't make a right" argument.  However, it should at least give us pause to contemplate why we are okay with one but not the other being legalized.  When you stop and analyze why you are fine with more deadly drugs being legal, but adamantly opposed to the legalization of a relatively harmless one, it should at least make you question whether you've been duped at some point.  If you're a rational human being, the inconsistency of it all should raise questions.


10) The concept of legalization crosses party lines; i.e. it's not just for those "hippie" democrats.  The tea-party and libertarians should favor it because this is yet another example of big government stifling our freedom. If you want to shrink government, why not start with the DEA?

11) And speaking of the DEA, how are we doing on the drug war? Have we won it yet? And if not, do we have any hope of winning it in the future, unless there's a serious game changer? It's a war that's been raging for decades and we seem to be no better off than we were when it started.  Perhaps the DEA could get a handle on the drugs that actually cause harm like heroine and crack if they didn't have to spend so much time chasing down pot heads.... and then maybe, just maybe, we'll finally win that war.

Shut up, ma. You're killing my buzz.
12) It's sounds trivial until you really stop and think about it: there would be a lot of commerce generated via the legalization of marijuana.  Not only in terms of the plant material meant for smoking, but it has also historically been used to alleviate headaches, physical pain, and sleep problems.  Not to mention all the paraphernalia that is a cottage industry in and of itself. Plus, the fibers can be used for paper, textiles, etc.  Yada, yada, yada.  You get the point - it's a cash crop not to be underestimated.

If you'd like to add your own short argument, by all means leave it in a comment. If you have a dissenting opinion, I'd like to hear it as well.

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